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Jeffrey Katzenanda
Unregistered User
(9/6/01 2:04 pm)
Reply 		Spiritual Disneyland
Back in the early 1980's I had a professor who swore off my comment that SRF was the place to go by telling me that he had visited Lake Shrine and left with the impression that he just discovered a "spiritual Disneyland." Naturally I was insulted at having my SRF be reduced to Wonder Bread status. But there you go. In the years to follow, being a good yogi missionary, I'd bring my open-minded non-SRF friends (all of my friends are open-minded) to Sunday Services. The results always commenced in embarrassment. "These people are so self-absorbed and goofy ....etc." was the common response. On one fine Friday night, I once hauled my mother to a Mother Center Open House. All she could remember about the place was how over-cleaned it looked and then seeing some nun sweeping some dirt under a rug. The very comment seemed surreal because, if you know SRF nuns the way I do, you'd know they know exactly where the dustpan is. Maybe Master was trying to pump me with a metaphor that evening. Finally, (you're probably wondering how I know about SRF nuns) there was my ex-bramacharini girlfriend who was so perenially critical and moody of SRF that I mistakenly had to conclude she was suffering acute PMS. For someone as smart as me, I guess I was too dumb to read the signs.

I'm done fighting with these naysayers, these minor prophets. I now have to ask for their forgiveness. After twenty years, I'm afraid I have joined their ranks.

My professor didn't know SRF the way I do. But as the wave has the essence of the ocean in it, so does his comment about Lake Shrine betray a truth about SRF in general.

Is SRF a spiritual Disneyland? Let's inquire. First off, like Disneyland, the operations are hid from the public. People go to Disneyland to escape the mundane. Why does SRF have so many visitors every year as well as the usual temple cats and monkeys hanging around? Because the vibe is good, the grounds are pretty and well-maintained, and the ministers and devotees are non-obtrusive (at least publically). When I've had a mind-bender at work, I like to go to Lake Shrine and watch the swans glide or I go to Hollywood Temple to hear Brother Bhaktananda repeat the same joke for the thousandth time. It's like being back in the 1940's and 50's-- a simpler time -- when all was "Leave it to Beaver" and "The Waltons." Or in Disneyland nomenclature, like a walk down Main Street U.S.A.

Every time I see that quaint display of Master's lunchbox and satchel, I think of the horseless carriage and fire engine. And Mother Center itself as City Hall. The driveway as Main Street. Everything perfect and clean. And isn't it by Master's plexiglass coated chair that Daya Mata and Mrinallini Mata have both sat and spoken with as much repeatable ardour as the animatronic character in "Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln"?

Comparisons abound. I got to thinking about it. Lake Shrine is definitely Fantasy Land. My professor clued me in on this. You've got Dumbo and Sleeping Beauty. I hate to say it but the women I've met at Lake Shrine may be spiritual but they aint got their feet on the ground. Mad Tea Party probably suits those male cads who wear bangles. Storybook Land Canal boat ride, definitely, for all those Hollywood industry people who sail on through. And for all those devotees who refuse to grow up and get real, we've got the Peter Pan ride.

I'd like to reserve "It's a Small World" for Mother Center. Plus I've heard "It's a Small World" is Daya Mata's favorite amusement ride. I don't doubt it. In fact, I'm wondering if she's ever gotten off that ride. I think we can safety say the Matterhorn is the monastic order. And for all of you feeling very confused about your experiences in SRF, there's Alice in Wonderland. Wouldn't either Vishwananda or Satyananda make perfect Cheshire Cats?

Of course it's not all superficial. Hidden Valley is as rugged as a destination in Adventureland. Of course, Disney's Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse reminds me more of the triple flight ascencion to Master's bedroom. The way everything is cordoned off. When I was a kid, I always wanted to play with the Robinson's stuff, but it was always "please keep your hands inside the ride at all times." I must confess however that each time I visit Master's room, I manage to touch his shoes. But don't tell anyone. They might start encasing those in plexiglass.

Of course SRF does have a fun side. Every picnic or Convocation or Youth Program is a much a thrill as any Tom Sawyer Island in Fronteirland. I mean, hey. Bringing SRF to the Bonaventure is, you gotta say, kinda living it up for a change.

Disneyland has New Orlean's Square, a kind of sanitized version of a Jungian shadow. This is where the pretend bad guys get to act out. You know: the Haunted Mansion and Pirates of the Caribbean. Well in SRF, we have Halloween at the Mother Center, don't we? And throughout the year, India Hall (instead of promoting real culture) puts on little pseudo-spiritual dramas for the Sunday cartoon and Speilberg crowd.

Disneyland has Mickey's Toontown where you can meet Mickey himself or get bounced in Goofy's Bounce house. What do you know! We have a public relations department, too!

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm stuck in the SRF's equivalent of Disneyland's Critter Country out here by my lonesome with nothing but the bears and coyotes. Unless you consider Cherry Valley or India that. Both places are (off the record) final destinations for exiled monks. Let's see....where did they say Devananda is being shipped off to?

Don't forget that both SRF and Disneyland are now multi-million dollar corporations.
Both were started by visionaries (that's the good news). Both ended up being run by anal retentive control freaks (the bad news). The food never changes at Disneyland, and, last time I ate at a Temple, the dish was still curry.

On the surface, SRF is quite a provincial achievement. And Southern California, being the place of theme parks (Olivera Street, Knotts Berry Farm, Universal Studios, and Disneyland), might as well have one more cute theme park--- a spiritual theme park with large appeal to draw in the public. There's a utility to that, I will admit. On the other hand, it's baffling to me how an organization begun by such a profound individual as our guru could prefer attracting numbers over reaching out to higher human thought. But thinking isn't allowed in SRF. Positive thinking is.

Have I forgotten anything? Oh yes. Tomorrowland.

When I think of Tomorrowland, I think of innovation and utopian projects. But here SRF has no equivalent. Or let's just say the innovative part of SRF is "still under construction." Disney has the Astro Orbiter, Cosmic Waves, Innoventions, Star Tours, and Space Mountain, I'd like to think there is an equivalent in SRF somewhere. Unfortunately, there really isn't. In fact, the only Space Mountain I've ever found remotely related to SRF was smack dab in the middle of my forehead. But I guess that's where it should be. Wait a minute. Tomorrowland has "Honey I Shrunk the Audience." I think we have a match.

SRFdevotee
Unregistered User
(9/6/01 4:24 pm)
Reply 		Profound
Behind the humor and mild sarcasm, there is deep truth here. Out of fear--fear of making mistakes, fear of being wrong, fear of being unqualified, fear of being weird--the SRF leadership has taken the road of externals and superficiality. They think to "protect" Master's work by giving no one, anywhere, any reason to be critical. The supreme irony is that, of course, this path leads to endless criticism. In trying to please everyone, they have pleased no one. At least, no one of consequence.

Master was not this way, even according to their own testimony. Master would not do things this way. The claim that they only ask "What would Master do?" is the most pernicious of the falsehoods.

Disneyland, indeed.

Charlen
Unregistered User
(9/6/01 4:25 pm)
Reply 		brave
If you have used your real name you are very brave. i am using a fake name because I am really afraid of what would happen to me. I still like going to church and all my friends are SRF people. Even though I think they are friends i don't know what would happen if we talked honestly, and I'm afraid to find out.

sorry to be so afraid but I am.

Jeffrey Katzenanda
Unregistered User
(9/6/01 10:11 pm)
Reply 		To Charlen
Dear Charlen,

You can be assured many or your SRF friends would drop you as if God never created you. That happened to me and I found it exciting. I suddenly realized who my true friends are. Probably many people on this site, for example.

Kazenanda is not my real name. That's a play on the name of one of the ex-pres's of Disney. I'm kinda looking forward to using my real name one day. If you are still young and in need of a place to hang, you may find it hard to speak your truth and jeopardize relationships at church. That's okay. Sooner or later, you will make the decision which is best for you. I have friends in SRF who cannot deal with the hard facts about SRF. They simply need to believe what they want to believe. Ever read "The Emperor's New Clothes"? I'm the boy who cries out "Why is the Emperor naked?" My friends need to live in happy land. I've decided to allow them that space. But they also know my position. We try to talk about what is mutually meaningful whether it be God, art, life, or whatever.

Most of us who are coming forward need to claim our individual power back, our sense of autonomy. It's more important that we not betray our perceptions than that we avoid cause to be fearful. Fear is passe. We're past tired of compromising our values. We have experienced the greatest pain in this area and have never received support for what we've been shown. If you were standing close to a burning house, the heat would be so extreme that you probably wouldn't feel a lit match if someone held one next to you.

I have lost a relationship with my father because he compromised values of common decency. He stole from the family and used legal scare tactics like SRF. He even tried to financially bankrupt and morally destroy my uncle. Isn't this what SRF is doing with Ananda? After going through this pain once, nothing is the same. I faced my father. I made him aware that I disapproved of his behavior. And he rejected me and hasn't spoken to me for over three years. Never calls on my birthdays. There were many I knew in SRF who never checked up on me since I stopped attending services. And I was very active in church. Among those who stuck their heads in the sand was the minister at my temple. For years I felt a duality in SRF. They preach unconditional love but they give only conditional love. I had lost two families. But I grew by confronting my father on his wrongdoings, and I'm feeling an amazing redemption watchdogging SRF.

One thing these similar events helped me to realize is that my challenge was to stop being a boy and become a man. And being a man means sticking for principles even if the world is against your opinion. So I'm exploring that mystery, and I must say the experience is sublime.

Remember. our galaxy is 50,000 light years across. You would have to travel 186,300 miles per SECOND for 50,000 years just to get to the other side. And that's just one tiny pinwheel in the garden of God's universe. You are a child of that immensity. And you say you're afraid? Come now!

God bless you, and know that you are not alone and that all is well with whatever you decide to do.

xmonk
Unregistered User
(9/7/01 5:53 am)
Reply 		Kazenanda
Dear Kazenanda,

How I enjoyed your posting. Your were 100% correct in what you said. Your experience with SRF is exactly what untold numbers of laity and monastics have experienced. It's truly a refreshing FREEDOM to cut the ties. After spending years with the organization, it is so refreshing to be able to think for oneself and to see things clearly once again.

To Charlen: Yes it is frightening to see through the muck and mire of SRF and being afraid to get away from it. You see, that is what a cult will do to you. The brainwashing is intense and extreme. Yes, many of your friends don't have the vision that you seem to have. They, in all probability, don't want it. They are comfortable being sheep. Feeling as you do about SRF, make the break from them. Be true to yourself. When your friends have finally had enough of it, they will do the same. In the meantime, take the step toward freedom and happiness. Don't be afraid that by leaving SRF that God will desert you because you "turned your back on the guru." God has blessed me over and over and over since I left the ashram and the organization. The peace and love that I now feel was NEVER felt while in the ashram. God loves you unconditionally. What more do you need?

Xinsider
Unregistered User
(9/7/01 6:19 am)
Reply 		To Charlen
As you can tell, your posting made an impact on some of us former SRF'ers and monastics. And I for one hope you will take to heart the encouraging words of Katzananda and Xmonk. I just wanted to add that you might be surprised at how your friends react to what you have been feeling. Truth has a way of percolating through everyone's heart and mind.
If you don't feel like going to church with them as usual, maybe you could suggest that you go somewhere else for a change -- on a walk, to the beach...And if you feel like talking to them about why you don't want to go to church now, you could try just speaking from your heart and letting them know you do not want to change them -- that you just want to be true to yourself. Maybe your courage and honesty will help them to grow a little too.

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