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SRF Walrus

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SRF Walrus > I need advice > Friends
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Author	Comment
Moving On Unregistered User (10/10/01 10:42 pm) Reply	Eyes wide open In response to Realistananada's plea for us to look at things in a more pragmatic way - I would prefer to walk this path with my eyes wide open - never to be blinded by externals ever again. What works for one may not work for another. Many of us have been exposed to parts of the organization that leave one far from inspired. For this reason, what seems pragmatic / realistic for you is a slow death for others. SRF grounds are filled with Masters vibration for me - when I am not sidetracked by the characters that live there. So, please try and understand that we do share the same goal - we want to feel Master constant presence too - we're just going about it a little different than you.
Atavika Unregistered User (1/16/02 12:10 pm) Reply	Friends I don't know if I can be of help, but I will try. When I was 21 I joined a religion that taught that only they would be saved, and everyone else, those in the world, you were not to socialize with. When I was tossed out for committing one sin, I was shunned by all. If I saw them on the street, they would look at me as if I didn't exist. The pain was terrible, the depression, the worthlessness. Now I was out in this world, a world where I considered others to be evil, and yet I was not good enough for my friends in the religion that I had to leave. When I saw what SRF was doing, I was devasted. When I walked away, I lost my friends, but this time I realized that it would not be as before. I had learned that you can let go of people, as hard as it is. Most of you are experiencing this for the first time. There are things that you have that I didn't, one is each other, two is that you don't believe that the world is evil, so you can still relate to those in it. I don't understand why the people on this board are so afraid of SRF that they can't meet somewhere. That doesn't mean when you meet that you have to identify yourself as a person who wrote on Walrus, just that that you had read it. I believe this would be very healing. Talking on this web site is great, but you need human contact in person.
lutamata Registered User (8/29/02 11:13 pm) Reply	Re: Friends thank you for sharing. i am new to the board and just read this. it has helped me understand what an ex-nun was trying to tell me 7 years ago. and like so many who were ignorant of what was happening inside, i thought, why is she so angry? if monastic life was not for her, then she should have left, and accepted that it was not for her and moved on. i thought that she was not made of the "right stuff". thank you very very much for making me see what she was trying to make me see. but because she was so angry, she was unable to communicate things clearly to me. i do not remember who she is, she was just introduced to me by my ex-husband who was afraid that i was involved in a cult. because that was what the ex-nun had told him. all i can do now is think about her and hope that she has recovered from her pain and hurt. and i do believe (at least i pray) that she has moved on. and i hope that there could be a way for me to say how sorry i am for not having any acceptance, compassion and understanding and for being so judgmental at the time . it is sad that organized religion always tends to distort the teachings of a wise soul. i am no longer an active member of srf (but still attend some functions occasionally), not because of anything definite (the monks' talks were beginning to bore me and somehow some of them just did not ring true); there were too many rules, restrictions and secrets which i did not consider necessary in my spiritual quest; a lot of the long time members tended to be clique-ish, elitistic and sometimes downright rude ("i have been a member for 20 years, so i know what it's all about"). but i will always be thankful to srf for providing the structure to meet my guru and the teachings i needed to give my direction to my journey. but right now, i am doing it on my own because the organization tends to be too convoluted in its shoulds and musts... thank you again for making things clearer for me... namaste.
Amidala of Coruscant Registered User (3/24/03 8:03 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? You have been an SRF monastic and I am wondering does Master confirm in your heart that everything is okay? I am going through it right now that I no longer feel like attending SRF temple. I'd rather do my kriya at home. I made such a wonderful friend who is not a devotee and she was the first person to show me how to treasure friendship. I'm curious to know how Master has touched X monastics and reassured them because I know it must have been difficult and it has been hard for me to make the decision not to attend SRF yet I never miss going to temple. They look at you as if you no longer are connected to God and I feel that they would see me that way too but it doesn't matter anymore because I say to God and Guru "I would rather break all the rules and have loved You from my heart then follow every SRF rule and have lived in fear of You." That is true. I decided to stop fussing with this rule that you HAVE to attend SRF group meetings whether you like it or not otherwise you won't get liberation. I am making lots of friends outside of SRF and receiving much inspiration from them because they seem more devoted to God and less bent on following every rule in the book. I thought it is wrong how SRF hides Master's picture and when I admired the picture, SRF friends would tell me not to be so expressive. My best friend a non SRF devotee really appreciates my conncection with Master and supports me. I just met a shaman who is very close to Master and regularly communes with Him even though he is not an official SRF member. In my opinion he is truly saintlike and treated me like a human being and talked to me instead of avoiding me. I felt like SRF monastics always avoided me because I'm not popular like someone such as Timmaris or Ron Hart would be.
chela2020 Registered User (6/1/03 6:05 am) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? (This message was left blank) Edited by: chela2020 at: 6/25/03 11:14 pm
ranger20 Registered User (6/23/03 11:35 am) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? *Quote:* I would rather break all the rules and have loved You from my heart then follow every SRF rule and have lived in fear of You. I read this some time ago, and returned to it after an email this weekend from an out of state relative. His wife had a really serious medical condition flare up, and he called all his family and friends a month ago to ask for our prayers. All along, though quite concerned, he expressed the thought that he knew it would work out. It looks like it will. He sent everyone an update, and a simple expression of gratitude to a loving God, that it stopped me in my tracks. He had none of the sense of fear that I know is still grafted onto the background of my relation to God and Guru. Several differences. He's a Methodist. Over several decades of friendship and service in his church, he was able to tell us, he had "people around the world," praying for his wife. The honest truth is, that here I am, on "the airplane route," and I'd be hard put to muster friends around the state in a similar crisis! And even more, I think to his core, he accepts what I think of as the basic truth of Christianity, that you can be in right relation to God, as a gift, by grace, simply by saying yes to it. I think de facto, SRF in it's most frequent manifestations comes down on the "other side" of that old controversy, that it's our "works" that will save us...and that's a loosing proposition, because we can never do enough kriyas, or whatever, to "earn" the sense of being at home in God's universe, that my relative has, with his simple (bullock cart) faith. And where is Master in this? This is one reason why I cherish the story of "The bad man who was preferred by God." I think I see PY shining through that more than in any teaching that serves to arouse fear. Like the story of the Prodigal Son, I guess I think that true teachings tell me that the moment I turn toward God with an open heart, I'm home in that moment - whether or not I've gone to meditation this weekend.
etzchaim Registered User (6/24/03 9:56 am) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Ranger20, I haven't posted recently, but your statements here really caught my attention. Since the argument you speak of between 'grace' and 'works' is coming out of the Christian scriptures and has been used as a means to criticise Judaism, I thought I would point out a few things. All religious expressions have positive and negative forms within them, meaning that, if you were to examine all forms of Christianity, you would find some very positive expressions of the idea of 'grace' and you would also find some very negative expressions of the idea - as in the Fundamentalist belief that all Jews and non-believers are going to 'burn in Hell' because they do not have that 'grace'. Just as there are non-Fundamentalist and beautiful forms of Christianity, there are also non-Fundamentalist and and beautiful forms of Judaism - which continue to stress the need for good works, but do not believe that there is a disconnection from God in any way, except that the person fails to see the connection that's always been there for them and should be encouraged to pick that connection up. Also, if you look around, you will be able to find positive expressions of Kriya. I happen to be from another Kriya lineage (from a disciple of Yogananda, though) that is not dysfunctional in the way that SRF currently is (I stress 'currently' here). The idea that breathing alot of Kriya is somehow going to 'save' a person or cause them to progress spiritually AUTOMATICALLY is completley foreign to what I have learned from my Guru. When a person breathes Kriya in an unbalanced and fearful or rigid state, the Kriya can actually harm a person. If the person is constantly feeling degraded and worthless, breathing alot of Kriya can be dangerous. The problem is not the type of connection - grace vs. works, the problem is the dysfunctionalism within the form of these paths. All paths can lead to God, it's just that some expressions of these otherwise good paths are not very healthy. With respect, Etz
soulcircle Registered User (6/24/03 11:00 am) Reply	true sharing of experince and understanding Guests, etzchaim and All, etzchaim, your post represents what the best of this board is..... we thank you [referring to myself in plural feels good, including friendships, as part of being, beyond and including individualism] we circle
ranger20 Registered User (6/24/03 11:37 am) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? etzchaim A lot of interesting threads going on. I happened upon your reply after taking a "wrong" turn at the top level, looking for another message I'd seen earlier. The thread I was looking for had to do with our own "hopes, dreams, fears" keeping us in SRF, even after the dysfunctions become apparent. I think fear may be the biggest issue. In bringing up grace vs. works I was not thinking of Judaism at all - a faith about which I know almost nothing. I was thinking more along the lines of the reformation, and especially the situation in the west for the prior 1000 years. For Christians, no salvation apart from the one and only church. Luther's radical idea, that one could form his own relationship with Jesus, and that the very act of seeking that relationship carried salvation with it must have initially seemed mind boggling to those who first "got it," and they would have been those who were chaffing at the rules & regs, and hoops of the then institutional church ("psst, wanna buy some indulgences?") This, apart from some of the absurdities that followed - like the Puritains, who still haunt our collective psyche. I'm wondering if there's not an analogy to the current situation with SRF. SRF moving, via the "loyalty" issue, to establish that it's the one route to the Guru, and hence salvation. Others, chaffing at the institution, wanting to form their own relationship to the Guru. What about the Kriya pledge? Does that mean I'm damned if I go to another church, damned being updated to mean another bunch of incarnations? Contemplating that, and I think we start contemplating a lot of repetitions of the worst events of our current lives. That can generate a whole lot of fear in me, at least, and a consequent "oh, maybe it's not that bad" attitude toward the dysfunction. At that moment, "grace" can seem awfully sweet. And it takes me down to some of the roots of my spiritual aspiration. What kind of God do I want to have a relationship with!!! I'm thinking of the Twelve Step imperative, to find a God of "one's own understanding." And I come around to that God and Guru of infinite compassion who jumped off the pages at me the first time I read the Autobiography. And these are just random musings as I scratch my head and wonder where I lost track of them!!!
etzchaim Registered User (6/24/03 12:37 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? SoulCircle, we thank you from the fullness of our hearts Ranger20, the possibilities are endless... It hadn't even occured to me that you were thinking of the Catholic Church. Perhaps it's rather a symptom of becoming institutionalized? I work with a Lutheren (I think that's how it's spelled) who very politely informs me, regularly, that the only way to God is through Jesus. He's always very polite and even appologizes for offending me, so I have to keep reassuring him that I'm not offended because I don't believe the same things he does and he's so polite! Did I tell you he was polite? Anyway, Orthodox Jews will tell other Jews that that there is only one way and that's their way, and they'll tell non-Jews that they have to follow the 7 Noachide laws (these are extracted from the story of Noah) or they will not go to heaven. I think there is an analogy between the Church and SRF, but I think you could extend that to all Fundamentalist expressions of religion. When I first found the Walrus I was really struck by the similarities between what people were going through here and what I was goind through, having just left being completely immersed in the Orthodox Jewish world. I returned to my Guru whose main comment was to beware of Fundamentalists, even Fundamentalist Yogis and he keeps insisting that I incorporate Jewish mysticism into my Yoga. I'm still trying to work that one out. There's a vast difference between what I learned and continue to learn from him and what people are saying about SRF. There's no attempt to control what we do in our lives, we can go to any type of 'church' we want - he want's me to start leading Jewish services in the small group of mystically oriented Jews I've started hanging with, for example, and he encourages us to read and learn as much as we can about other paths. It's almost the opposite of SRF. The control issues sound really crazy there. I wish I could tell you what to do with the Kriya pledge. Being Jewish I would look for the loop-hole in the law (laughing, laughing, if you don't know much about Judaism, you might not get that...). It's fairly clear to me that much of the current SRF policies are diametrically opposed to the teachings within the lineage. The Muslims that Lahiri Mahasya initiated were not made to give up Islam, etc., so is the Pledge a corruption? If it is, then I, personally, wouldn't feel bound by it. I would write a letter to Babaji, or Yogananda, and explain why you are doing what you're doing and then burn it, or bury it, or do whatever you feel is necessary to separate internally from feeling guilt over it. I'm not telling you to do this, but if I was in your shoes, that is how I would handle it. I honestly believe that the lineage cares alot more about your ability to move towards God and enlightenment than it does about your loyalty to a corporate entity. Above all, don't feel guilty! (I AM telling you that). The grace that you're looking for is already with you, and it's there in the lineage, all you need to do is open up to it and realize that all those negative emotions are just programming. They're not what you are. Etz
ranger20 Registered User (6/24/03 1:40 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? *Quote:* I think there is an analogy between the Church and SRF, but I think you could extend that to all Fundamentalist expressions of religion. Nail on the head, I do believe; all Fundamentalist expressions. *Quote:* I wish I could tell you what to do with the Kriya pledge. Being Jewish I would look for the loop-hole in the law (laughing, laughing, if you don't know much about Judaism, you might not get that...). Well there is a loop-hole. On the ca. 1980 Kriya pledge card I have, is (1) "In my search for God, I accept as my Gurus...[plural, all six are named] and (2) a pledge to "exemplify the ideals of SRF church." I don't see that attending another church service, or reading "other" books, violates either of those pledges! Have they changed it? I have heard people on the Walrus suggesting they've been explicitly told not to do either of those two things, but I think that's what they hear from the pulpit, not anything in writing. In one of the SRF lessons, Master says about reading (paraphrase) "don't read trash. Read spritually uplifting books." period. Also when my family was overseas, I spent two years in HS at an upstate NY boarding school, where a majority of the student body was Jewish, so I got the "loophole" reference. But what really caught my attention in your message was this: *Quote:* I was really struck by the similarities between what people were going through here and what I was going through, having just left being completely immersed in the Orthodox Jewish world. I returned to my Guru whose main comment was to beware of Fundamentalists, even Fundamentalist Yogis and he keeps insisting that I incorporate Jewish mysticism into my Yoga. I'm still trying to work that one out. Now here is the key thing. For the past five years I have felt a deepening pull toward my own roots in Christianity. It's like the current in a river, things go a lot better when you move with it. Yet I resisted it for some time. Almost on a daily basis, I address this prayer to PY, "I will will, I will reason, I will act, but guide thou my reason, will and activity..." And for some part of those five years, I didn't get that the deep impulses that my mind and heart were trying to follow, that those deep impulses in themselves might have been the Guru's response! Why? Because somewhere I got the notion that my mind and heart were not trustworthy. Now I am able to look at passages in the SRF magazine, and notes from Convocation speakers that state that explicitly. And yet, for the longest time, I felt like someone with the mark of Cain (I know some of the stories...), simply because my insides didn't match up to their outsides. Wow! And I didn't come nearly as close to the dark hole as some on this board! In the Spring 2003 magazine, there is a quote from PY, that is something like: "trust the Soul, as the Self within you, more than any philosophy" Enough time wasted, that is what I'm trying to do, and so far the Walrus is prooving really valuable in working it out.
etzchaim Registered User (6/25/03 7:06 am) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? I have no idea about what is said in the Pledges. I was never asked to sign anything when I was initiated. To tell you the truth, having only had experience with the Temple of Kriya Yoga in Chicago, I was quite shocked when I found the Walrus and came under attack myself from one of the not-so-blissful, hissing 'bliss-bunnies' that sometimes post here. Shelley had told G. Kriyananda (the Chicago K. not the Ananda K.) a number of things about Yogananda and we have a decidedly householder path going on (both Guru's married), and what I consider a very realistic approach to a number of issues (including Yogananda's humanity and level of attainment). G. K. (this will not cause as much confusion as just saying "Kriyananda") repeatedly tries to teach us to rid ourselves of self-defeating emotional judgments of ourselves and others and I've spent a good amount of time attempting to deprogram myself of these patterns (re: the mark of Cain). You sound like you are moving in the right direction and are healing. I agree that the answers from Yogananda are coming to you internally. You should listen to them (sorry about the 'should'). I went seriously overboard when I left the Temple, becoming Fundamentalist and believing that I was participating in idolatry if I did any Yoga. I recommend that you learn from my experience and DON'T DO THAT! because, now that I'm on the other side of my journey, I can see how I made some very wrong assumptions. I was told by a very strident Rabbi that evey time I did a Yoga Asana it was the equivalent of bowing down to an idol. This is, of course, completely ignorant, but I bought into alot of this. I really miss my library! I gave away/through out a huge number of books. Sigh... You don't sound like you're going to go that way, but I feel like I need to say this. Yogananda himself was working at bridging Christianity and Kriya Yoga, so you really have alot already to work with. I'm also fortunate because Shelley worked with Kabbalah so I'm not really starting from scratch and the similarities between Yoga and Kabbalah are really striking. Someone told me that once when they visited him he was so excited about the 4 lettered name of G-d and it's hermeneutic meaning that he took out a Torah and spent a good amount of time telling them about it, almost childlike in his enthusiasm. I've managed to resolve alot of my theological issues (like using the names of Devi's and Devata's, etc.) through parallel 'energies' in the Angel's and Archangel's. G.K. explained Hong Sau for me when I was having trouble with it representing Vishnus mount (I think it's a gander?), or the sound of it's wings. It's an approximation of the sound of the breath - because you aren't controlling the breathing - not trying to breathe, not trying to not breathe, the breath eventually starts to flow on it's own, bringing you back to the balanced currents beyond the personality and emotional/ego issues. Obviously my strict monotheism is very important to me, but I'm moving beyond the blatent and, I now realize, ignorant biases I had that were causing me to throw out the baby with the bathwater. I hope everyone reading this realizes that I'm not judging Hinduism or any other polytheistic religion - just following my own path! The sounds 'Hong Sau' are apparently the closest vibrational approximation to the 'original breath'. Also, according to Shelley, the 12 lettered mantra has a vibrational affect similar to musical notes that he'd worked out. As of yet I haven't started to investigate that one, but it's on my list... There is a 12 lettered name of God, just as there's a 4 lettered name. Also something I want to investigate further. Anyway, I wish you peace and success on your journey! Etz
ranger20 Registered User (6/25/03 4:27 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Last night I located several quotes I like that came to mind during this exchange: *Quote:* Faith in the Self, the soul, as the temple of God within man is more important than faith in a philosophy. --Paramahansa Yogananda, (Spring 2003 SRF mag, p.9 *Quote:* It is good to be born in a church, but it is bad to die there. It is good to be born a child, but bad to remain a child. Churches, ceremonies and symbols are good for children, but when a child is grown, he must burst the church or himself. --Swami Vivekananda, (July 2003 Yoga International, p. 56) *Quote:* The master encouraged his various disciples to adhere to the good traditional disciplines of their own faiths. Stressing the all inclusive nature of Kriya Yoga as a practical technique of liberation, Lahiri Mahasaya then gave his chelas liberty to express their lives in conformance with environment and upbringing. -- Autobiography of a Yogi, chap 35
chuckle chela Registered User (6/25/03 9:28 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Ranger, you wrote: "Because somewhere I got the notion that my mind and heart were not trustworthy." I suspect this is a core issue. I suspect these feelings of not being trustworthy are common enough in SRF that they have a significant influence on how much unfolds. Perhaps the dances of weird behavior which go on between monastics and lay members receive some impetus from these feelings of unworthiness: we feel unworthy so we look to the monastics for all the answers. The monastics feel unworthy and so feel the need to exert control and . . . away goes the dance. While it's possible that some (many?) of us brought these feelings of inadequacy with us into SRF, it's also probably true that the SRF culture does much to foster and maintain these feelings. Sadly, it never gets examined, it never gets talked about. Every once in a while there's a voice in the wilderness, such as one our friends or people on the outside, or even a lone minister saying "don't buy into all this 'you're not good enough' nonsense"; alas, these voices are all too often drowned out in the cacaphony of voices saying, "don't think for yourself . . . trust only the leaders . . . we know what we're doing . . . you don't understand . . . ." As if that weren't bad enough, the behaviors of many in the SRF community reinforce these "you're not good enough" messages. Heck, I've seen myself do it to others, and I'm more than a little ashamed of that. The quote from Vivekananda really resonates with me. It's sad that SRF, not just as an organization but more primarily as a community, has allowed itself to become so rigid that many in the community would have to tear themselves free in order to keep growing. Etz, I loved what you had to say: "I honestly believe that the lineage cares alot more about your ability to move towards God and enlightenment than it does about your loyalty to a corporate entity."
Amidala of Coruscant Registered User (6/26/03 12:35 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Em hotep (greetings in peace) It is amazing how the people who inspire me and lift me up are people outside of SRF. Very honestly, it was a real crises for me when for 10 years I only did SRF things and then one day I read a book called Initiation by Elizabeth Haich and suddenly was feeling very connected to the presence of Nutjer (Ancient Egyptian God). I fought with this for almost 3 years because I was trying to be that good little SRF devotee but there comes a time when I realize I just have to listen to my heart and the more I do, I find the more blessings come my way. I'll give just one little example. One day, I decided instead of going to Service Day, I attended an Egyptian dance class. The miracle is that I never had any close friends in SRF and it almost seemed a sin to try to call anyone just to say hello. But when I went to that dance class, I found my best friend and she's my soul sister and a Tai Chi master. She has been very supportive of both my kriya path and my yearning to grow more into my Egyptian path which undeniably my heart is being called no matter how much I have tried to supporess it. The more I embrace it, it seems I am able to do my kriya routine again and I often think about Gandhi and Lahiri Mahasaya's kriyabans. They never told the devotees to give up their religion only saying Scientific Healing Affirmations. Personally I am much more inspired chanting Egyptian mantras throughout the day and reading the Egyptian Naha Nata scriptures. I like to read Where There is Light before I begin my SRF meditation routine. Your Methodist friend makes me think so much of many wonderful people I see who aren't devotees and yet they take the time to say hello. And they have a postive faith and aren't trying to be the top dog. Learning to be a simple person trying to make your way in the universe. I just simply want to follow my heart. I will always love kriya and never give that up but I got so tired of being told by SRFers that I have to stick only with Whispers and Healing Affirmations when I love so much to sing my mantras. Gandhi always sang his Rama mantra and Rama was his deity even though he was a kriya initiate. If anyone could, especially any X monastics, please share with me any experiences in which maybe Master told you personally that everything is okay and you're doing the right thing. Any special dreams or spiritual messages or events? I have decided to stop going to SRF temple because it takes a lot out of me and yet when I go into my heart, I feel like this is the right decision I'm making to be a kriyaban following my own special path rather than trying to be a carbon copy of Daya Ma. A devotee friend told me she honestly doesn't think Master would reallly enjoy goingto the Sunday services either. She told me you can go to SRF for 17 years (she did) and no one even knows you. The co founder of the Egyptian path I follow is also a kriyaban from Canada. Check out our site. It's like Egyptian SRF without any of the dogmatic rules. The founders are really nice and encourage people to embrace and even study other teachings while studying and following theirs. This beautiful website is: www.thelivingnuhati.org Nutjer esmouw antuk (God bless you) Jai Guru (Duwa di kriya sashaam) Amidala
etzchaim Registered User (6/26/03 12:49 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Amidala, perhaps you can find a way to not associate Kriya with SRF and see that the Kriya and the Egyptian scriptures and traditions you are attuned to so well are ONE path - yours! Etz
ranger20 Registered User (6/26/03 3:37 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Chuckle You mention two parallel but distinct things, "not trusting mind and heart," and feelings of inadequacy. I'm not going to tackle the inadequacy issue because it's too huge. I think you are right, though, and (1) a lot of us bring it in to SRF, and (2) the SRF culture does in fact maintain such feelings. The overwhelming message is that as we are, right this moment, we are not okay. Nevermind the stories you occasionally hear, that strangers on the street were drawn to Master, and never forgot the meeting because he was so completely accepting of everyone. I was considering the many ways in which the message is given, that we cannot trust our own perceptions. Truly crazy-making! Another "D" word. Put the word "Delusion" on someone, and it's like the psychological word "Denial" - everything that follows can be discounted. Suffice to say that this winter, when I was looking up something in one of the lessons, I was really surprised and delighted to find the statement that you should "listen to the promptings of your heart." How refreshing! How counter to most recent sermons and tapes. Amidala *Quote:* If anyone could, especially any X monastics, please share with me any experiences in which maybe Master told you personally that everything is okay and you're doing the right thing. I've received some clear assurances regarding particulars. Although I mentioned this on another message, earlier this spring I got hit by a rush of guilt in comtemplating going to an Ash Wednesday service. I really wanted to observe Lent (the image of solitude in the wilderness was really pertinent this year). Anyway, I was annoyed at getting blindsided by the guilt yet again. I took it into meditation, and asked Master directly, and perhaps a bit rudely, "Okay, no games or subtelty, is this okay or not?" I didn't have long to wait before the thought came very strongly, "God appreciates all movements toward him." I haven't gotten any "global" inspirations, walking away from SRF for good? I realize I've been at the fringes for some time. More so now. I'm just waiting, watching, tuning in to this board, and above all, trying to tune in to my own depths.
Amidala of Coruscant Registered User (6/26/03 5:57 pm) Reply	Re: Sharing with Friends? Thank you Ranger. I didn't have long to wait before the thought came very strongly, "God appreciates all movements toward him." This seems very similar to the answers I feel in my hesrt about this whole thing. while my heart tells me to keep up with the kriyas, it's only that guilt stuff that says you have to go to SRF temple and if you're not happy there, oh well, then you've got karma to work out. That's one that devotees will often throw at you when you decide to start meditating at home instead. One monastic told a devotee that not going to temple will cut you off from Master's blessings.

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